Wednesday, October 22, 2014

To Do Or Not To Do List

I find that there is oftentimes a big difference between the optimism with which I write my To Do lists and the reality of how they are executed

Go For A Run - Start out on my street and after twisting my ankle on the shoulder of the road 15 times in the first quarter mile and limp around like John Wilkes Booth after jumping from the balcony to the stage of Fords Theater, then turn around and go home

Fill up my weekly medicine box - go to grab the pill bottle out of the top ...cabinet, drop it, have pills spill all over the kitchen and run around like some deranged druggy in some pharmaceutical Easter egg hunt

Make a nice healthy lunch - What??? We have Uncrustables!! Score!

Pull Weeds in the Yard - After dipping myself in a vat of SPF 999,9999,999,999 and putting on a winter hat, a baseball cap, a t-shirt, long sleeved shirt, hoodie, winter jacket and tucking jeans and long johns into 2 feet tall tube socks to ensure that none of my pasty whiteness is exposed to sunlight, go outside and pull at the weeds on the back hill that are obviously rooted into the Earth's core, go inside and order some of those pills that those guys in fitness magazines with veins shooting out of their arms, chests, legs and eyebrows are holding

Have a freeze pop - Nailed It!........wait! No! SLOW DOWN! You'll get a......AHHHHH!!!!!

No comments:

Post a Comment