Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Fearth of July

Would it surprise you to learn that I was a major American civil war buff back in the day? Probably not.

While I was in elementary school I took trips with my family to Gettysburg, Fredericksburg and Atlanta to see some of the historic sites that, to many people's surprise based on the names, are not masses of ice in Antarctica. I carried on intelligible conversation with terribly bewildered tour guides and even got some canister shells from a gift shop.

As a youngster, Fourth of July always terrified me, I loved the fried dough but I hated the loud BANG of the fireworks so my dad decided we would pretend it was cannon fire and I would name a civil war general with each blast, cuz nothing curbs a child's fear quite like pretending the loud noises they are hearing is a bunch of antiquated artillery fire.

So tonight if you hear someone shouting last names, come on over, give me a hug and strongly suggest that we move to higher ground

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