Thursday, June 1, 2017

Mrs. Officer

I've heard it said that 90% of communication is nonverbal (although maybe I saw it in writing because for someone to say that would be kinda backwards). So with that in mind, I'd like to think that my kindergarten characteristics for courting a cootie-infested young lady were quite reasonable. It was something like "Maybe if I awkwardly glare at her from across the cafeteria and never EVER speak to her she will get the message."
\
I have since learned that women are not half-bad and can be quite enjoyable to talk to. However, this freezing fear and perplexing paranoia had to manifest itself somewhere and sadly, it seems to me that whenever I spot a cop parked on the side of the road my mind goes "OK, are you sitting up so straight that you're about to flip over the top of the seat? Good! Are your knuckles practically transparent from gripping the steering wheel? Excellent! Now, make awkward eye contact that says "I'm a law-abiding citizen doing absolutely nothing wrong and I figured I'd best communicate that by looking at you instead of watching where I'm going."

No comments:

Post a Comment