If you are driving in a left turn lane, please (Chris Farley voice) “For the love of God” make a left turn. People seem to have this desire to want to engage in a game of Tic Tac T-Bone rather than recall the 1492 discovery of Christopher Columbus that the earth is indeed not flat, which today allows us to be comforted by the fact that if we have to drive forward an extra hundred feet, this ever revolving planet of ours will not allow us to spiral out of the solar system. Among my fathers’ ironclad axioms of adulthood like “Because I said so” or “Wait till your mother gets home” (because we all know who wielded the power, right?) was “If you get in a turn lane, make the turn.” Live free or die was a battle cry, not a suggestion.
Now, although this is probably a pointless errand, I’d like to address the drivers of Massachusetts:
“Mahk wants you to try wicked hahd to pahk ya cah so ya don’t look like an idiot.”
Thank you.
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