Funny Business

First World Anxiety: Those fridges that beep if you leave the door open too long. It’s like the writers for Mission Impossible called...

Parking lot ice: Making white people dance since 1934

I have never been more defensive in my life than when I walked up to a store owner and tried to calmly explain that all 3 stalls in the ba...

In order to compensate for my visual deficits while pulling my car in to the tight fitting garage, we put Styrofoam pool tubes on either edg...

Last night around 5 p.m. I called a pizza place in the area and ordered a Chicken Caesar Wrap. (Judging by the number of times I had to repe...

My birthday is that weird day of the year on Facebook when I want to say thank you to everyone, but I don't want to sound like some egot...

I think the best part about having my own place is that now, whenever I'm talking to a girl at the bar and things aren't going so we...