Stall Tactics

I have never been more defensive in my life than when I walked up to a store owner and tried to calmly explain that all 3 stalls in the bathroom were clogged while also making it explicitly clear that I simply walked in to the situation and had nothing to do with it. I ended up sounding like an ironically less potty mouthed version of that rapper, Shaggy, as I tried to explain the situation:

“There was poo-poo in the first stall, wasn’t me”

“Mummified Hershey’s in the second stall, wasn’t me”

“I need to go home and shower, wasn’t me”

“You can see it on the cameras, wasn’t me”